The White House

Executive Fan Mail We've Received

Both the Internet and the use of information technology to distribute government information are evolving rapidly. Here are some of your thoughts on this most serious matter.

Most frequently suggested Alternate Whitehouse color:

Pink (Red is a close second.)

Most common request made of the President:

Subject: Birthday Card for Grandmother

Hello! I hope this note finds you doing well.

I read in a magazine once that you send birthday cards to citizens over 75 years of age. My grandmother would love to receive one and I would like information on this. Thanks for your help.

Most frightening statement made to the President:

Subject: Scandal? What Scandal!

I'm behind you all the way. Your comments today are enough for me! Tell them all where to go and let's get on with the business of America! You deserve the same rights and privileges as the rest of us. You are not guilty until the court says you are! I'll be here to support you in WHATEVER you do! You are my President and I trust you will do the best for me and all Americans!

Rick M., Houston, Texas, Republican

Date: Fri, 23 Jan 1998
From: Cindy T.
Subject: page tampered with....again!!

On your home page, where there is to be a picture of you and the vice president, there are 2 men. Also Under Presidents past times, there is a picture of Genifer Flowers and says "The President hits a home run every time at bat" This is not going to help with your public during all this scandal. Just thought you would like to know about these things.

Cindy T.

You were expecting, perhaps, two women? -Bill

Date: Mon, 26 Jan 1998
From: Cindy T.
Subject: Re: page tampered with....again!!

They were not you and the vice president!!!!!

Sorry I said anything!

Date: Mon, 26 Jan 1998
From: Mary D.
Subject: color change?

You are not seriously thinking of changing the color of the White House, are you? I can't believe this is anything but a joke. Please tell me it's not true!!!!

Mary D.
U. S. History teacher

Date: Sun, 25 Jan 1998
From: Ralph
Subject: Defacing of Web Site

I think there should be a law when someone goes into any web site and defaces it intentionally. But especially when they are doing it to our commander and chief and the command center of our great country.

Date: Sat, 24 Jan 1998
From: michael f.
Subject: Mr. President

Sir my name is michael f. i live in clarence new york ...i have a our part plan to get you out of this mess .ill give you the first two ideas ...your going to have to change the perception of what men and women think about this you do this by first appealing to men by showing very sexy women in an off the cuff interview saying they see nothing wrong whit this .if you can think of what these men are thinking as they watch these women ..the same thing can be done with women sexy men ..once these people see there on weakness then they can empathize with this .please contact me for the other half of this plan it has to do with hillary and microsoft.

Date: Fri, 23 Jan 1998
From: Harry L.
Subject: Clowns

Hey, you two characters are the worst and most offending jokers to the American people I've ever heard. YOUR PROPOSAL TO CHANGE THE AMERICAN FLAG, is not only the most ridiculous and insulting and even perhaps comical issue. HOW you two jokers are responsible to have the access to this WHITE HOUSE world wide communication system is beyond an honest Americans belief . For the first time in my life I personally hope that you and your entire Administration are replaced . HOW DARE YOU!

Greg A.

Date: Fri, 23 Jan 1998
From: Jeffrey G.
Subject: Advertising?

You're kidding, right? I mean, we all thought that the little sign with the legend, "your ad here" was a whimsical joke. We have always had the impression that the Clinton White House was for sale to the highest bidder, even if it was a Communist Chinese agent, but this is like something from Saturday Night Live (ala the Richard Nixon plan to fix the deficit: a Going Out of Business Sale ["Next, we have Rhode Island; a small state, but cute!"]). You guys have got to promise us that you're kidding. As if the President's personal problems were not laughable enough, selling ad space on the White House website will only pour fuel on the fire.

Nice site, but it needs a little more, but that's not as in "advertising." Good luck and tell the President to hang in there. Even this latest din will subside.

You know, its ironic that you should mention pouring fuel on the fire, since the major oil companies have lined up to contribute. -Bill

Date: Thu, 22 Jan 1998
From: Reference Desk
Subject: your page

You've got a great parody of the White House here. I'm using it in my Internet class as an example of official-looking pages that aren't.

Mark A.

Date: Thu, 22 Jan 1998
From: Mike G.
Subject: Check the photo's

Why is the official White House webite showing Mrs. Clinton as the president and Mr. Clinton as the first Man?


Mike G.

Date: Thu, 22 Jan 1998
From: C. Nancy & Cliff

Your address and the are totally opposite. I find it offensive that with those three letters transposed that I will end up in a definate pron situation. I accidentally ended up there and all of a sudden there was a picture of the first lady with a well endowed chest with stars positioned over them. No I am not a Democrat, but I definately believe that that is showing a great deal of disrespect. I feel that with the rules governing xxxx shops not being a certain distance from schools that this is a double standard. We are getting the web into our schools and kids being kids are always finding ways to beat the system. I feel like getting this type of material off of the web is not restricting freedom of speach its just getting immoral subjects out of the reach of minors. These kids learn how to navigtate the web in school and how many of them are monitored at home? Our country is so morally decayed now and its time to get some morality back in the system. I believe our legislators need to reflect back on this summer when the Promise keepers held the Stand in the Gap rally in Washington DC. For every man there there are probably close to a million men that couldnot afford to travel to Washington. These people are going to stand up and be heard and its time the moral side is heard. There are two many small groups of the immoral minority that are dictating policy. Lets wake up and get this country back on the track that it was founded on.

Cliff C.

Date: Sun, 18 Jan 1998
From: S. W.
Subject: White House-ads-taxpayers

I'm not so sure this is an appropriate way to do this.


Date: Sun, 18 Jan 1998
From: Phylis B.
Subject: Jolly Roger

If what I see in that picture is Jolly Roger I hate it. The flag looks like a skull and cross bones and does not belong with the White House! I really do hope you chose something more appropriate.

Thank you, Phylis B.

Date: Tue, 06 Jan 1998
From: Keith K.
Subject: whitehose.NET vs GOV

Wow. I am certainly impressed with the accuracy of this page. You had me going there for a minute! is so similar besides the green whitehouse its almost identical! You are a threat to national security! :)

Date: Mon, 5 Jan 1998
From: Juho L.
Subject: moro


don,t launch the misless, even nuclear misless

Date: Tue, 30 Dec 1997
From: Mohamed G.
Subject: white is better now

i think it`s better to still white because we used to be white , if i change my opinion i will tell you .

mohamed g.

Date: Thu, 14 Aug 1997
From: Ron W.
Subject: Advertisment

What's going on with The WhiteHouse HomePage. Yesterday there was a Jolly Roger Flag Flying over the WhiteHouse and an eyepatch on the Vice President.

Today there is a sign in the frount yard of the WhiteHouse wanting to know if you would like to advertise on the frount lawn of the WhiteHouse.

Ron W.

Date: Wed, 06 Aug 1997
From: Carey R.
Subject: 1. Advertising to support webpage and 2. Prez's involvement in UPS strike.

Dear Mr. President,

My two comments here are related. I would hope that this message is forwarded to all relevant chaches (thank you).

1. Do not use advertising to support the webpage. In fact, do not ask the question the way you have: By even using the phrase "ease the burden on the taxpayer" you imply that there is a burden and/or that it is unjustified. It is not unjustified. I am GLAD to have this access, this communications link. Business has made far too many incursions into our lives as it is. Business would have us believe that ALL taxpaying is a "burden." I want good roads, good services, good education, help for fellow citizens who need it (and less armed services "protection"). Business is not all of American life. Strong communities, families, schools, and arts are even more important; business must SERVE those entities, not direct them. Business has become the tale that wags the dog.

2. In the same vein, please do not interfere with the UPS strike--UNLESS IT IS TO PROTECT THE RIGHTS OF THE WORKERS. President Regan's intereference with the flight control workers' strike was a major blow to the interests of workers and citizens. He put the interests of Big Business ahead of citizens at large. Our workers have fewer and fewer resources for addressing injustices. UPS's logic is that they have grown so BIG that now they are some kind of national service that we cannot do without. Part of the competitiveness which they would subscribe is fair and healthy for their domain is that they maintain a fair and healthy relationship with their workers--which their competitors have achieved thus far.

Date: Fri, 18 Jul 1997
From: Bruce MC.
Subject: Stealthing of the White(guy)house

I think it would be in the best interest of public safety to stealth the entire D.C area. This could most effectively be done with a thermonuclear umbrella device. To maximize possible benefits to the public, the shielding should be activated during an Amerikan Bar Association convention.

Date: Fri, 11 Jul 1997
From: Shake
Subject: Green House

I think it is a disgrace to the American people and demand it to be removed to the Wite House, or the people that are responsable for this will be very sorry.

Date: Fri, 04 Jul 1997
From: Robert H.
Subject: Selling advertising to offset the cost of the White House ?

Dear Sir:

I canot think of anything more DEGRADING to do than mabey selling BILLBOARD spaces on the sides of the sides of our Presidents Home, our mabey Even on the Rotunda? What the HELLS wrong with you people ? How is that going to present our countrys World wide web site ? What if Communist China is "high bidder" on the add space ? are you going to refuse to accomadate them? the A.C.L.U. would have the Government in court on freedom of speach violations in a heart beat!


Excess to the White House and all government sites should be add free.

Bob and Kathy H.

Date: Mon, 02 Jun 1997
From: Bill and/or Marie F.
Subject: .net vs. .gov Vive la difference!

One should never underestimate the ability of the average person to completely miss the point of humor. May I just point out, to all those people who are outraged at the *rental* (not selling) of ad space, change of flag, etc. that they obviously weren't paying very much attention. Still, it lends a certain amount of humor in itself, how many people take things too seriously entirely.

Date: Fri, 2 May 1997
Subject: This is so cute!

I have to say that I am very impressed with the humoristic approach... mocking the government is always fun. Thank you so much for clarifying, in a response to one of those lovely letters, that this isn't the right Whitehouse Home Page, I thought the government had finally lost it completely. Keep up the good work on mocking that fine institution!

Date: Fri, 18 Apr 1997
From: Vicente H.
Subject: About my dream (Literally speaking)

Mr.Bill Clinton
President of The USA

This message is to let you know that prior to your accident, I had a dream about yourself. In my dream you were standing against a door, holding a broom. When I sow you, I felt exciting and I approached to you. I greeted you and you acknowledged it. You told me you have to walk to the drug store to buy medicine, cause you were in a great pain in your right leg. I volunteered to go for you. You wanted to hand in some money to me for the medicine but I refused. I was counting on my own money... OOPS I woke up. I told my husband about this, and he replied to me, to let you know by Internet, so you be careful. Unfortunately I forgot to do that, and two days later I learned about your accident in the paper. Next time I have message for you I promise you I won't overlook it. Note that I have dreams that reveal either good or bad situations.

Date: Sun, 23 Mar 1997
From: Walter B.
Subject: Get the American Flag Back!!!!!!!!!!!!! ASAP

Many people may think that is cute, but I believe that it is very sarcastic and should be removed immediately.

An American Patriot... Give me my flag back... I'm not going to pledge to what is raised now!!!

Walter B.

Date: Sun, 23 Mar 1997
From: Milton S.
Subject: Home Page

I find the changes to the Whitehouse home page in bad taste and lacking in good judgement. I hope the individuals responsible or I should say irr-responsible finally get it out of their system.

Date: Fri, 14 Mar 1997
Subject: Homepage

Who is messing with the homepage? Is it supposed to be funny? Please get it back the way it should be,

Date: Tue, 11 Mar 1997
From: Rochelle R.
Subject: wrong phone number

your phone number for white house is the directory assistance number

Date: Tue, 11 Mar 1997
From: A. M.
Subject: Page

If the jokes on this page such as First Man rather than President and a link to the McDonald's web site are intentional, I'm glad to see that the Whitehouse can have a sense of humor about such slings and arrows. Keep up the good work. Nice web-site!

I think the last time the real White House exhibited a sense of humor was when Bush declared his disdain for broccoli. -Bill

Date: Mon, 10 Mar 1997
From: Scott H.
Subject: Presidential icon

To whom it may concern:

The first time I viewed the White House home page the Presidential icon had Beavis and Butthead on it. Is this supposed to be funny? I think that perhaps everyone has gotten too familiar with the President. I do not believe that respect is dead, but I believe that it is on its last gasping breaths. Please do what you can to restore the respect and dignity the office deserves regardless of who is elected to that office. I think that instead of being able to send e-mail to "Bill" or "Al," their proper titles should be used. Thank you for your consideration.

Scott A. Hall

When I read something like this, I begin to understand why the White House is afraid to exhibit a sense of humor. -Bill

Date: Sun, 9 Mar 1997
From: Jeff L.
Subject: No Subject

Dear Mr President,

I hope that you are not seriously considering selling advertising on the grounds of the White house or any other public grounds. What you will accomplish is nothing compared to the cheapening and De-edification that will result from doing such a thing.

Sir, I once proudly served in the Marines and went to war for my country because of the belief that I was serving my country to the best of my ability. But, it seems that the country that we once so proudly defended has deceivied us and then added insult to injury by lying to us by saying that what some of my brethren is suffering from is a mental disorder (Persian Gulf Stress Syndrome).With all of the soldiers and Marines getting sick can you still say that this is some sort of mental breakdown?

Sir the next time that you are with the Commandant of the Marine Corps ask him what the acronym JJ DID TIE BUCKLE means. This acronym and what it stands for is instilled into the Marines as they go through boot camp and as they continue on in to the Fleet Marines. This acronym is not only an acronym but a way of life.

The cost of the White house cannot be that much of a burden compared to the money that we send all of these little countries in order for them not to go belly up. Instead of giving them the money every year (knowing that there is no possible way for them to pay us back), how about teaching them to survive on their own. Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day. Teach a man how to fish and he will eat forever.

The cold war threat is over. Let us start concentrating on our own rather than helping the rest of the world with it problems. There is always the need to help other countries and I believe that we should when there is a disaster of some sort. We need to look inward at our own problems now before they get out of hand.

I have heard that there will be a bill presented to Congress to change the currency of our country to a 2 bill system. One to use in the country and the other outside the country. This is a bad thing. What do we as a nation stand to gain from this?

Let's get the country back on the gold standard and stop borrowing money from the Treasury so that we can hopefully pay off this national debt so that we can make our own greenbacks. That is the only way to make this country really strong again.

Mr. President I can't possibly know how busy or how stressful your job must be but, I do know that the country depends on your intestinal fortitude to carry on and make things happen for us. Please make the proper choices and listen to the American public. Or we will be forced to have someone in the White house that will.

Thank you for your time and I hope that you will have a chance to read this and answer me back.

Your humble servant,
Jeffrey L.

Date: Wed, 05 Mar 1997
From: Dianne C.
Subject: Love it!

Thanks for a great page! I have used it in my teaching to show students that they need to to evaluate info they find on the 'Net. One of my students had found the page and thought it was the real thing.... then thought something tricky was happening... it illustrated the point I had made earlier in the session beautifully.

Well done!

Date: Fri, 21 Feb 1997
From: Brooke S.
Subject: Forget the Green !!! What about yellow?


Where are the golden arches on the whitehouse? Seems to me that they're missing.......... so maybe an honorary mcyellow.


Date: Wed, 19 Feb 1997
Subject: SOCKS

I am a cat lover and understand that socks has his "own" e-mail. Please subsribe me to his list.

Thank You.
Freda B.

Date: Sat, 08 Feb 1997
From: Rebecca W.
Subject: colors

I really like your page except my parents grounded me for screwing around when I was supposed to be researching for my American History paper. I thought your page was far more educational! Unfortunatly they didn't agree.

I think the whitehouse should be wrapped in that 'crime scene' tape cops put around crime scenes (redundent, I know). That way everyone would know how dangerous it is.

Date: Sat, 1 Feb 1997
From: Jakob L.
Subject: Concerning the very important subject of choosing the right color.

I am glad, that I am given the opputunity to help you out in such an important situation. I am discontent vith the green colour. I ask myself if it is not possible to find a more accurate green shade. One must take into consideration that the green colour is one of hope and then ask oneself, is it, in fact, a suitable colour. After all, what has a green colour to do with the white house, white beeing the colour of innocence and purity.......Okey got me there, maby the symbolic meaning has nothing to do with it.

As mentioned before, I do not like the green shade at all, but some of my friends do. It is a difficult dilemma, trying to please everybody and you will find out that it is simply not possible.

Except for Yours truly and some of my friends, I do not think that anybody cares for participation in decision-making at that level. But then again I do not know the Americans as well as you do.

So my advice to you is take a chance. Think for Yourself, you can do it, I know, I have tried it.

I hope that I was at some assistance in helping you out with your problem.

Yours sincerely
Jakob L.

P.S. Pardon my english, I am danish.

Date: Wed, 15 Jan 1997
From: Margie C.
Subject: Ads at the White House

You may have to get permission from the "new owners". I understand that it was sold for campaign funds.


Date: Sun, 12 Jan 1997
From: Virginia S.
Subject: Your site

Laughter is good for the soul!
Liked your site.

Date: Thu, 09 Jan 1997
Subject: flag

I do not like the idea of changing something mine and your forefathersfought for. I't is a symbol of courge and the fact that america is a place that we can live in peace. I get the impression that if you want to change the flag, you are trying to help the future generations forget the past. Then the thread that america is hanging by will surely snap!

P.S. I have liked a few of the things that you have done for america but please lets leave the flag the way it is in respect for the slain soilders who fought for freedom so all american's can be free.

Date: Sat, 21 Dec 1996
From: Terry G.
Subject: Ad Space for the White House

Don't sell ad space for your introduction to the website on the White House. It is a crass materialistic move that would add to the public cynicism about the institution of the presidency being for sale. Good corporate citizens should contribute to the web page's continued existence without overt recognition. Furthermore, I do not believe that the cost of maintaining the web cost is an onerous or undue burden to the taxpayer. This sounds like a cheap libertarian-Republican initiative.

Terry G.

No no no, you misunderstand. The White House is not for SALE; its for RENT! -Bill

Dear Mr. President (if that is indeed who actually responded!):

I stand by my assertion. It is more perception than reality. I realize that, of course. You ought to know better than anyone else that symbolism matters as much, if not more so, than substance.

I happen to teach American government to students at Southwestern Oklahoma State University. While I am a big fan of yours, I see first hand (albeit anecdotally) some of the cynicism of students about public officials. It is terribly unfortunate, and I do all I can to correct the simplistic notion. Those who serve the public in an elected or appointed capacity (particularly at the White House) should help to alleviate the problem. I know that PAC support by interest groups and "soft money" given by interest groups and individuals to political parties do not necessarily buy the loyalty of either the members of Congress or members of the Executive branch, but it does provide access. I am also aware that buying (renting?) ad space does not in any way guarantee a quid pro quo, but it appears to part of a continuing pattern. As a hard core liberal (and an American traditionalist) I am concerned about the increasing corporatism of our political institutions. The advertisement in front of the White House is merely a small sympton of larger phenomena. The ad space in front of the web site is trivial in the scheme of things, but demonstrates a quality of mendicity!

Ever so humbly yours,

Terry G.

Date: Sun, 01 Dec 1996
From: Barbara P.
Subject: 60 Minutes/CBS TV /1 Dec.'96

Your worried about protecting the Pres. with stealth? You'd better get busy and be worried more about what is leaving the US of A and going to foreign countries from our 'trash pile' as you lessen the amount of armor available.

All I heard during the last political campaign was about gun about control of COBRA helicopters?

Frankly, I think you are all wet about the gun control. That woman who is now in congress because her husband was killed and her son wounded...maybe if either had packed a gun, having been properly trained in handling it, the one wouldn't be dead and the other may not have been wounded.

There was precious little in the press about a woman who won a place in her state gov't. because she fought to be able to pack a gun rather than just tote it in her car. She felt she may have been able to save her parents and some of the rest of the I believe 23 who were shot.

A gun can do a bad job on people but these helicopters and the ordinance materials going out as described on 60 minutes a few minutes ago frighten me FAR more...and should YOU too.

Date: 6 Nov 1996
From: Rod R.
Subject: I'm a teen and would like you to read my comments.

Ever since your policie on Teen smoking, I have been accounted for 12 larceny charges. I am severly addicted to cigarettes and now have to steal from stores which used to let me buy them. I feel pathetic when I have not an oportunity to steal and have to rob ash trays or walk over to metro station and bum cigartes all day.

This act you damed upon us may make the voters happy but take in mind that your a fool to just set your goals so low..

I would like your feedback..
Rod R.

Date: Mon, 21 Oct 1996
From: Tom M.
Subject: jolly roger??

on the opening page url: the u.s. flag has been replaced by a jolly roger


if this is a joke its a bad one please make sure it is replaced with the flag of the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA

thank you
tom m. reserves, retired

Date: Sun, 06 Oct 1996
From: Jonathan H.
Subject: Interception of Dole-Kemp Internet Home Page

Mr. President --

At the conclusion of the televised debate tonight, Senator Dole notifed the audience of the Dole-Kemp home page on the internet. When I tried to access it (, the transmission was intercepted with Clinton-Gore '96 campaing information. Whether this interception was accomplished by a person working in your campaign or by some hacker, please publicly denounce the interception as soon as possible tomorrow morning. Your supporters and Mr. Dole's supporters need to know that this interception was not part of your campaign strategy.

Jonathan H.

Try It always helps to use the right address. Not only that, its considerably more plausible than a wide-spread conspiracy to deny access to information. (p.s. WhiteHouse.GOV, not Duh!) -Bill

Dear Mr. President --

I wrote to you immediately after the first debate because I was concerned that some hacker had intercepted the Dole-kemp home page. I did not claim, and do not believe, that you or any of your campaign officials were responsible for it or that some "conspiracy" existed. I did believe that the perception could exist that it was a "dirty political trick", and I believed that you should disavow any connection with it. All I wanted to see after the debate was what "stuff" the Dole campaign was putting out.

Instead of responding with some interest and concern (as I had assumed you naturally would), one of your munchkins has responded with an arrogant and asinine little letter deriding me (assuming, I suppose, that I am a Dole supporter) for apparently mistyping the e-mail address. The munchin's petty response has not lessened my opinion of you, but I don't think you need that kind of person on your campaign staff.

Jonathan H.

Date: Sat, 14 Sep 96
From: Barbara A.
Subject: (no subject)

How did John Wilkes Booth, get past the Secret Service to shoot President Linclon?

Date: Fri, 13 Sep 1996
Subject: <<<Don't Cheapen The White House!!!>>>

I find it apalling that Bill Clinton is renting out rooms in the White House to fund hi re-election. Come on Bill. This is the nations most valued asset & you have to cheapen it all in the name of money? What else are you going to rent out? Air Force One???

Date: Tue, 10 Sep 1996
From: Carolyn D
Subject: Advertisements on the Whitehouse lawn?

We have Blight laws in our town that try to keep it cleaner by limiting the size and number of signs. Maybe some expensive bricks you could put names on and build a needed wall somewhere there.

Carolyn D.

Date: Wed, 04 Sep 1996
Subject: Forget the flag

I think that instead of a photo of the Real White house, Why not a shot of an Arkansas white "out" house. Let's face it, what Bill and President Hillary have done in the past four years (defending the gay lifestyle, up with same sex marriages, gays in the military, and the whole Hollywood crowd scene.) a pink flag, flying limply over a white outhouse makes a closer statement. Don't you agree?

Date: Fri, 09 Aug 1996
From: Diane L
Subject: hackers

I put this up on the internet on August 9th. In red letters it said Hackers were here. They changed the picutures of the president and vice president.

This saddens me. I love this service and hope they won't ruin it for others. Silly pranksters?

Can you please change it back?


Date: Thu, 25 Jul 1996
From: Jackie M.
Subject: Alein guest

Dear Bill; My family have always had the highest clearnce and I have a Psi-talent, I can tell what a persons home surroundings are like with no input from the person. I would like to provide this service to the goverment Alein reseach program. Let me know.

Date: Wed, 5 Jun 1996
Subject: idea

Estate for Sale
For information Contact:
Whitewater Development Co.
Little Rock Arkansas
Cash only. No Checks or Credit Cards.

Date: Tue, 04 Jun 1996
From: Mark J.
Subject: Your web page.

Hello, I just wanted to let you know that your web page has been tampered with. Someone changed the flag and put a patch on the vice presidents eye. There are some other small changes as well. I just wanted to bring this to your attention and I hope that you can catch whoever did it.

Mark J.
Bangor, Me

Date: Sun, 28 Apr 1996
Subject: We have another idea

Hey instead of a ad here sign how about a vacancy sign or an eviction notice...that would be better ;)

Date: Wed, 17 Apr 1996
From: Bruce B
Subject: Stealth technology

Can you make the IRS disappear as well?

Date: Fri, 05 Apr 1996
From: Marshall W
Subject: suggestion

We think you should have a pointer to the "Office Of The Building" and an email address of "president@office of the building".

That way, you can promote your web page from the office of the building right down to you and me. It could be a new Glenn Frey song.

Date: Sun, 24 Mar 1996
From: Stanton O.
Subject: Whitehouse ads

Great idea. I think Ross will be first in line. Nifty way to retire part of the national debt and take some of the runt's money.

You (whoever you are) have done a great a job with this page. The only thing I don't like is that I did not think of it, first.

Stan O.

Date: Sun, 24 Mar 1996
Subject: Flag

Perhaps the Jolly Roger should also fly over the IRS building.

Date: Tue, 19 Mar 1996
Subject: Rush Who?

Hey Bill, WHo the hell is this Rush Limbaugh charater?

Well, rumor has it he's a presidential contender. -Bill

Date: Tue, 19 Mar 1996

You guys have a sick humor for all of the people that have died and served this country wholeheartly. you can get sued for frued and the press already knows about this. What is up with this


And I thought the humor impaired were mythical beasts. Silence is by far the surest way to dishonor our forefathers' sacrifices. In terms of fraud, well, in an uncharacteristic fit of wisdom, Congress saw fit to pass some pretty strong protections for parody. If our current leaders could only catch the same whiff of greatness that Congress did we'd be in good shape. -Bill

Date: Tue, 19 Mar 1996

Please sir do not sign the bill to censor the Internet.

OKay, I won't... But I make no promises about what the President might or might not do. -Bill

Date: Tue, 19 Mar 96
Subject: WebSurfer Message

What idiot could confuse this with the real web site?

Date: Mon, 18 Mar 1996
Subject: Welcome To The White House

this is phoney!!!!
The real white house is WhiteHouse.GOV!!!!
this is dumb

Date: Sat, 16 Mar 1996
Subject: ads on www

Sell advertising on the Whitehouse page????? Isn't anything safe in the USA?

No. -Bill

Date: Sat, 16 Mar 96
Subject: (no subject)

Hey, I like the invisible White House. Now, can you do the same with the Capital Building, the Supreme Court Building, etc.?

Date: Fri, 15 Mar 1996
Subject: selling advertising on the whitehouse

As long as you include a healthy mix of "bogus" or ironic advertisements (ala SNL)to make the page interesting, I don't have a problem with selling ad space to defer costs.

We wern't talking about the web page... We meant the White House lawn, hanging from the flag pole, etc. -Bill

Date: Fri, 15 Mar 1996
Subject: The President Sucks

"Heh heh, heh heh. Cool. Let's, like, bomb Libya again, President Beavis. Heh heh."

"Yeah! Yeah! Let's blow up some stuff in third world countries! And then let's, like, censor the internet and stuff! Cool!"

Date: Fri, 15 Mar 1996
From: Joseph H.
Subject: The White Outhouse

I think the White House photo would be enhanced by the presence of a White Outhouse on the lawn, complete with stately columns and a crescent moon on the door. Just the touch to keep Bill from getting homesick for Arkansas!

Date: Thu, 14 Mar 1996
Subject: Your page

Hilarious! You've done a great job.

BTW, how did you get the images to alternate? I saw the <ALT> tag in your code, but didn't quite understand it. Could you help me?

We used Why?'s Counter patch for Apache and NCSA httpd. -Bill

Date: Thu, 14 Mar 1996

This is the funniest site I've seen in a long time. The best part is the address looks so authentic. I'm glad you didn't get into trouble with the real Whitehouse! Too bad the briefing room was "Blocked by Surfwatch". :)

What can I say. We can't have our five year old boys and girls looking at men's underwear. After all, department stores take special precautions, why shouldn't the web? -Bill

Date: Wed, 13 Mar 1996
Subject: Suggestions

Can you put "Golden Arches" on the Whitehouse?

Date: Wed, 13 Mar 96
Subject: (no subject)

I tink the Ad Idea and the stealth Ideas are both grrrreat, why not add a twist and sell stealth advertisements, therefore you can charge Big Bucks for incorporating the High Tech of Stealth technology, and not really even advertise at all, minimizing overhead costs.....goood idea huh??

Date: Wed, 13 Mar 1996
Subject: your ad here

The White House and Congress have already been sold to the highest bidder, so why not let them put their corporate logo on the outside too? What a lovely idea. Just imagine: "Tonight, from the McDonald's White House, we bring you live coverage of the State of the Union Address, with your host Ronald McDonald"! Love it!

Date: Wed, 13 Mar 1996
Subject: Arrrrrrr.

Excuse me, but isn't Algor wearing his eye patch on the wrong eye? And did Socks eat ANOTHER parrot?!

That dratted cat! -Bill

Date: Wed, 13 Mar 1996
Subject: What a great idea

This is an absolutely super idea. Why we can go on months creating and revealing the mysteries of this administration.
It is one of the most ingenious concepts of the day!

Date: Wed, 13 Mar 96
Subject: (no subject)

you should be ashamed of yourselves
the flag is no matter to joke around with you should not insult the veterans who served this country by proposing replacing our flag with a pirate flag even if it is a joke, it is in extremely poor taste.
aren't you guys up for re-election this year? please get rid of the sick sense of humor

Date: Wed, 13 Mar 1996
Subject: Hillary

Shouldn't the proper, PC, Feminist form of address for Hillary be "First Woman"?

I thought it was "First spousal person." -Bill

Date: Wed, 13 Mar 1996
Subject: Warning to visitors

You guys should warn visitors that if they aren't careful on this page they can end up on the real white house homepage. (the .gov one) That's a scary place to be.

Date: Tue, 12 Mar 96
Subject: (no subject)

In response to your questions about whether to change to a green house. Washington, DC, is not a rural enough setting for a greenhouse. There must be plenty of fertilizer in supply for a greenhouse.

Are you kidding? There's plenty of bull dung in Washington. -Bill

Date: Tue, 12 Mar 1996
Subject: stealth technology

Surround the president with mad bombers -- that should scare off those who are less than serious about their mission...

Date: Tue, 12 Mar 96
Subject: (no subject)

What happened????

I was just here earlier and the page was fine just the way it was. Is the gov't hassling you????

Personally I think you should put it back the way it was.

Hit reload a few times... Nothing has been removed, but there are nine different front pages. -Bill

Date: Tue, 12 Mar 1996
Subject: It's Cool But...

Hey the site is great, but I think that it would be better if your links went to pages of your own instead of the Whitehouse for real. You could come up with some great stuff for the families. I like the Beavis and Butthead button.

There are only two of us... But we'd be happy to take submissions. Keep them in the current style, keep them clean, and upload them to -Bill

Date: Tue, 12 Mar 1996
Subject: Skull and Crossbone

I think it's the best flag that I have seen in a long time!!!

Date: Tue, 12 Mar 96
Subject: (no subject)

I can't believe your server hasn't crashed yet. After Rush gave out your URL I bet it got slammed. Great Page!!!!

We got 150,000 hits today. We're amazed its still working too. -Bill

Date: Tue, 12 Mar 96
Subject: New Web Site

Now this is more like it!
I feel closer to the president already. Where are the endangered slug pages?

Date: Mon, 11 Mar 1996
Subject: Uggh, Coool!

This page rules. I much prefer this to the official page.

Date: Mon, 11 Mar 96
Subject: Flag change

Ahoy, matey. Belay, ye swabs. The Jolly Roger holds a rich place in the history of the world, but we may be better served with what we have. Do we need to advertise the true convictions of our devoted pirates (I mean patriots).

Date: Sun, 10 Mar 1996
Subject: Change of Color

It will remind me of my money, as govenment flushes it down the tubes!!!!

Date: Sun, 10 Mar 96
Subject: flag

Yo ho ho! (and a bottle of rum)
99 bottles of beer on the wall!

Date: Sat, 09 Mar 1996
Subject: this stealth thing

Well, i live near the nations capitol and you can't see most of the security around the whitehouse anyway. i don't know how you could improve on that.

Date: Sun, 25 Feb 1996
Subject: Stealth Tech on the WWW

I would need to know more about the disadvantages of stealth technology before I could say if I could approve of its use. I agree to protecting the President.

In case you missed a joke:

By the way, in case you missed it, here's a copy of the Associated Press news article about this web site, courtesy of the Seattle Times:


[White House icon] [Why?]

To comment on this service: